Afterglow
by SeriousLeeBlack
Summary: After tragedy strikes, all Bella wants is to get away. And what better place for silence and solitude than Forks? Little does she know that this one decision will change her life forever. Twilight re-told.
1. Walking Away

Chapter 1: Walking Away 

_Bella_

"You don't have to do this, sweety" my mother pleaded gently.

I feigned a _hopefully brave_ smile. Again.

"I'll be fine, Mom."

She sighed. We'd been over this for weeks now and yet she hoped I would stay. I guess a small part of me appreciated her concern; appreciated that I was wanted. But we both knew the truth.

I had to leave.

"We could get through this together." She took my hand in hers. "She wouldn't have wanted you to be alone."

I could feel the air leave my lungs. The darkness I had been ignoring reared its ugly head hopefully. I never knew a heart could actually feel broken.

"I guess we'll never know what she wanted."

I was determined not to cry- it would only make things harder. I couldn't get myself to say her name. To think her name. She was a tiny box locked away in a corner of my mind. A rarely used corner. Eventually, I hoped, the box would get misplaced and the memories wouldn't be as vivid.

That's the best I could hope for anyway.

"Have they heard from Evey?" I asked though I knew better.

"She called her parents over the weekend to say she was OK, but that's about it. The call was too short to trace."

I shrugged. Typical Evelyn. Take off without a thought as to what you were leaving behind. A part of my envied her. I couldn't dream of doing what she did. I would always be too preoccupied with the consequences. Or maybe I was just too afraid.

Downstairs, Phil honked the car horn.

I shut my one suitcase and handed mom my backpack.

"Well I guess this is goodbye." 

*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX***** 

_Charlie_

_I should say something…_

Bella stared blankly out the window, oblivious to my scrutiny.

_She hasn't changed one bit. Except for the eyes… she hasn't slept in, what- days? Weeks?_

They had driven in silence for almost an hour now after exhausting the usual topics- school, grades and the weather.

Carefully avoiding any mention of friends, feelings, the future- in short anything controversial.

Renée had been very clear- 'talking' was her department. The living arrangement was hopefully temporary. Bella just wanted to get away and Renée wanted to be supportive. Staying with Charlie was the best compromise- both Bella and Renée were equally happy (unhappy?) about it.

_I don't really care- I'm just happy to have you back, Bells._

"I just remembered." My voice seemed strangely out of place. "I got you a homecoming gift."

Bella snapped back to reality eyeing me warily.

"It's nothing fancy." I reassured her as we pulled into the driveway. "But I think you'll like it." I pointed at the red truck parked up front.

On second thought, maybe a beat-up old heap of metal wasn't something a teenage girl would appreciate.

"Seriously? That's for me?"

"Yup. Thought it might come in handy." She got out slowly and began inspecting.

"It isn't anything fancy-" I added quickly. "Got it off Billy for a good deal. He, uh, doesn't need it anymore."

"This is great," she beamed at me rather shyly "Thanks, Dad."

_And for the first time since this whole thing was set in motion. I thought, maybe it would work out OK after all._

*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX***** 

_Edward_

Alice stared into the night with unseeing eyes. She was in her favorite spot- nestled almost invisibly in the branches of the old elm near the 'kitchen' window.

I tried to not interrupt her- to not _listen. _We were statues for a few minutes before she smiled.

_They're on their way back._ A slight incline of her head beckoned me. _Come on up._

I was beside her in a moment.

"Jasper?" I asked out loud.

She frowned. "He didn't hunt. He's… determined. To build his endurance."

And just like that she was lost. We both knew it was futile- the shapes and shadows were dull and indistinct without a catalyst to crystallize them. A defining choice to focus the consequences of Jasper's latest decision.

But something else caught my attention. A scene that stood out in its contrast with the others.

Alice noticed it too and I saw her single it out- trying to focus the image into something recognizable. There was something oddly familiar about though it eluded me.

"It'll be better tomorrow" She reassured me. _This was different. I'll keep an eye out._

I smiled at her. "They're almost here."

"Goodbye, Edward." She hugged me softly and disappeared. And I was left alone with my thoughts.


	2. First Sight

_Edward_

I headed downstairs not a moment before it was time to leave.

The others were already gathered. It was a daily routine. One in which I had no place.  
>Today, Emmett sat on the arm chair near the fireplace, Rosalie perched on his lap, giggling.<br>Jasper stood looking out onto the driveway with Alice holding his hand in silence.  
>Esme and Carlisle were organizing the book shelf today. Occasionally, they shared a passage and smiled.<p>

It was not that I begrudged any of my family their happiness. Quite the contrary. Nothing made me happier than the certainty that they were safe, content.

I suppose what bothered me was the concern that I did not belong here- not in this part of their lives. I was the _odd_ one in a set of _evenly_ matched pairs.

_She's worried about you. _Carlisle's voice echoed in my mind as clearly as if he had said it out loud. _She feels you growing distant. So do I, son._

"Edward," Esme held out her arm, beckoning "Come join us."

Normally, I would refuse. Today however, I felt obliged. Esme was a gentle soul. It gave me no pleasure to cause her worry.

"Good morning, mother" I tried to sound cheerful. "What have you rediscovered today?"

"Tennyson!" she beamed, handing me the old hand-written edition; one of Carlisle's more exquisite gifts.

I perused till I came across an old friend:

Why are we weigh'd upon with heaviness,  
>And utterly consumed with sharp distress,<br>While all things else have rest from weariness?

"Will you play something for me, Edward?" Esme asked hesitantly.

It had been weeks since I had played- The lack of music bothered her, I knew.  
>Esme loved hearing me at the piano. She would be troubled of course. I vowed to do better.<p>

"Maybe later," I smiled handing her the book "It's getting rather late."

"Yes, I suppose you are right." she nodded replacing it.

"Goodbye" I planted a soft kiss on her forehead and left before I could feel guiltier. 

_Alice_

Today was not going to be easy. Jasper was on edge.

I was constantly torn between reality and multiple watered down versions of potential futures on the horizon.

More than once, I had sounded off alarm bells to...

_Edward. Is he OK? _

He frowned slightly. Nothing that would tip the others off but a sign that Jasper was not holding up very well.

I lost myself deeper in my visions.

_Jasper sitting in the chair doing nothing.  
><em>_Jasper running out of the cafeteria at break neck speed. The humans glancing at the rest of us in shock. Our secret unmasked.  
><em>_Jasper walking towards a small red haired girl at the counter… Bending his head to her ear… Whispering._

As the last image sharpens, I snap back to the present.

_Edward! Whitney. _Edward nods almost imperceptibly and kicks Jasper's chair.

He looks at me, ashamed while I smile encouragingly.

"Sorry," he muttered to the both of us.

"You'll be fine." I smile reassuringly. "You weren't going to go ahead with it," I add. A smooth lie.  
>Edward stays still. We both know the truth, but he has my back. We have each other's backs. Always.<p>

"I know." Jasper nods curtly. End of discussion.

I double my defenses. He is too fragile for risks today.

I smile and leave the table, dropping my untouched food in the bin. I know when he needs to be left alone. 

*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX***** 

_Jessica_

All day long, people have been staring at 'Bella' like she was the last girl alive.

I mean, come on! She isn't _that_ pretty. And is she really fooling anyone with that '_I don't like all this attention' _charade!

And why _Mike_… *sob* He hasn't taken his eyes off her all day. Or Eric even but who cares about... Woah. Is Edward Cullen staring at her now?! Seriously?! Him too!

Actually it's weird. Like he wants to make her explode with the power of his mind or something. Hahaha.

Oh well, that's the bell. Biology. Gross. 

*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****

Hello there!

Thanks for making it to Chapter 2! As an added favour, please do leave reviews. All feedback, whether praising or constructive, is appreciated

Next chapter: You know what's coming so stay tuned!


	3. Crossroads

_Edward_

My interest in her started off innocently enough. The lack of any perceptible _voice_ from her was intriguing, confounding and infuriating by turn.

But I know now what she is- a personalized torment sent from the darkest pit of hell.  
>Nothing. Nothing could have prepared me for the sheer debilitating intoxication of her scent. Never, in all the years of my existence, had I felt such thirst.<p>

I knew in that moment itself.

She would have to die.

_Bella_

I can feel the hatred radiating off Edward Cullen's body and I have no idea what I did to deserve it! It couldn't be me. It has to be something else… Right?

All through class I have making unnecessarily meticulous notes; trying to take my mind off the palpable loathing being transmitted in my direction.

My hair acts as a rather ineffective curtain against his glare. I've smelled it twice now and it seems perfectly normal to me.

I glance surreptitiously at the clock.  
>Forty-five minutes to go.<br>I don't think I can survive that long.

_Edward_

I imagine all the ways I can kill her.

I could do it right now. Never have I done anything so breathtakingly destructive.  
>The humans of course would be collateral- I would toss them aside like wrapping paper. Of course, I would never spill a drop of blood. No, she alone deserves that honor.<p>

Or maybe I would draw out the process…  
>Torment her the way she was tormenting me. Corrupt her every living moment with fear so pure, she was driven utterly insane. Until al last, she sought me out herself, begging me for release. A release I would be more than happy to grant her.<p>

_Bella_

What is _wrong_ with him?

Should I confront him? I steal a glance through my hair and shudder at his unflinching rage.

On second thought, that doesn't seem like the smartest idea.

I feel him shift in his seat and my body tenses.

_Edward_

My mind is made up. I must have her now.

I plan my attack. I must, of course, start the back. I could snap the necks of the last two rows in the blink of an eye.

By the time the humans become aware of the danger they are in, it would be too late.

They wouldn't have time to move. To scream. To have one last thought, even.

I would leave nothing but death in my wake, a trail of tears and mourning…

And just like that my thoughts de-rail. I see myself as the monster I have _almost_ become.  
>I see the lives I would destroy, the families I would devastate.<br>And, selfishly, above them all, I see the faces of my own parents. _Carlisle. Esme._

Is this what comes of all their faith and love?

No. I have to do better.

I stop breathing and feel some semblance of sanity returning.

My parched throat aches for deliverance. My limbs fight the desire to strike. And after decades of walking the right path, a battle rages in the darkest recesses of my soul.

Whether I will triumph, I know not.

*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****

_Alice_

Edward is a blur as he crosses the parking lot.

"Dude!" Emmett shouts. "Way too fast!"

Before he finishes the sentence, Edward has revved the engine.

"Edward?" I whisper hesitantly but he just shakes his head and reverses. Fast. Even by my standards.

I can feel the others' eyes on me but my mind is already far away. _Searching_.

Dammit! At times like this I wish I could see into the past. Find what provoked Edward to this extreme. I feel a stab of guilt as I think how easily this could have been avoided. I'd known something was about to happen for days, but I'd still focusing on Jasper so intently...

I feel Jasper's hand squeeze mine and our eyes meet. His smile reassures me- _What's done is done- See how we can help him now._

I lose myself to the Visions. It's been a while and my head starts to throb immediately.

_Edward,_ I focus, and a series of disjointed images assails me.

The shadows are slightly sharper than before but in a heightened state of flux.

In fact, I can see now that it's just one shadow. One person. I struggle to put a face to him/her. It seems vaguely familiar but I can't tell...  
>I push harder and now my head really hurts. Jasper's grip on my hand tightens but I can barely it.<p>

A girl. It's definitely a girl, but nobody I recognize. This girl is new. Someone we haven't previously encountered.

A strange thought occurs to me- the new girl? The moment I think it, the images sharpen. They still bend and shift but now I can distinguish the themes- see my brother's crossroads.

_I recognize now that shadow was Bella all along._

_And more frighteningly, that whether I focus on her or Edward, their futures are seamlessly entwined- undetermined but inseparable._

_They will either save or destroy each other._

My eyes snap open. Rosalie is at breaking point with Emmett barely restraining her. With a touch, I signal Jasper and feel a wave of calm sweep over me. I feel the others relax immediately. Except Edward of course- he is too far gone.

"You're leaving?" I ask him as I see this decision form in his mind.

"Apparently." He grimaces.

"You should tell them yourself- Carlisle and Esme…"

He nods curtly and pulls over at a bend on the road.

_I'm going to miss you. _I tell him as I get out of the car. _You will do the right thing. You are so much better than you know._

_As I will miss you._

In a flash he is gone- his decision to not harm Bella strengthening but not final.

And as I stand there with the rest of my family, my sorrow grow. We've lost a brother. Where he has gone, we cannot help or follow.  
>And worse still, I don't know if or when he will find us again<p>

*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX*****XXX

Thanks for reading!

And again, reviews are inspiring. You know what to do. *hints to button*


End file.
